Because I can.
See 20 pages of explanation below.
(Which also tell you a bit of what, when, and how, though not where.) ;D
Ok, now that you know I'm graduated, you might be wondering what I'm going to do next.
(Probably not, but just in the very slight chance you are…) :D
I wondered that for a long time too.
Every year I just did the next set of classes, adding in flying, horse training and riding, ski team, ski teaching, volunteering at nursing home, etc., as I could. But I knew that at some point I wasn't going to simply move up a grade. I actually had to figure out what I was going to do. (And if you know me in real life - wait, blogging is pretty much real life with me… ok, if you know me in person - you know decision making is my absolute favorite thing. Not.)
Anyway, when I was thirteen I wrote out what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wanted to have lots of children, fly a helicopter, and be a doctor.
Wings somehow won out over blades, and I decided I did not want to spend half my life in school.
(There were times when I wasn't so sure about getting married and having lots of kids, either, I must admit. ;)
In the past few years, though, as I really began to look at what I could do, I found there was not much I could imagine actually doing. I considered horse training, but I didn't want to get hurt. (Yes, I am a wimp. Don't tell, please.)
In fact, the only thing that sounded even remotely interesting to me was being a doctor.
I hate and despise being sick with a passion, so perhaps being able to do something about sickness was part of it. Getting a co-op biology teacher who was a doctor (she also did a lot of research on brain development, which fascinated me) might also have had something to do with it. My great-grandma moving in with us when I was 17, then myself moving in with my grandma when she got cancer, both might also have had something to do with it. Another factor might have been people saying, "You'll never be able to be a doctor!" to me all the time, when I gagged at the sight of people washing chicken up for supper. Watch me! :) Despite my stubborn reaction, though, I kind of agreed with them. Besides taking half my life in school, being a doctor would be icky.
Then when I got Rio it was like a lightbulb went on. I did not mind the gaping wound in her leg at all. I bandaged it every other day, gave her shots, bought her supplies… it didn't gross me out at all. She was my horse! And I realized…
I actually could be a doctor.
But all that time… Of course I was praying about all this, and one day when I was like I'm going to be 30 years old by the time I can actually DO something with my life! I suddenly thought wait. How old was Jesus when He started "doing something" with His life? Whose life was it, anyway? If God wanted me in school for 8 years, would I be better off not in school? I don't think so…
Still. Where would I go? How would it be payed for? Was that really what I should do? Should girls even go to college?
To tell the truth, I would have been somewhat relieved had we decided that they shouldn't. It would have been so much easier… because what we did decide was that "going to college" in the typical sense, was something that no one should do. Going to a college for a degree in a field that requires it, living at home with your family, and making sure you know what exactly you're there for, though… that is what I feel called to do. God has different plan for each person, and what may be wrong for one person to do may still be His will for another. Personally, I think college is stupid and a waste of time, :) but culturally, you cannot do certain things without a college degree. There are ways around that, but somehow a lot of people don't want to go to a doctor who went to school on-line. :P
As to should women be doctors… the answer to that should be obvious, though of course the important thing is what God wants a particular woman to do, not generalizations. :)
But basically - you have to go to college if you want to be a doctor. And if that's what God wants me to be...
I found a small college… in a beautiful town… associated with a medical school… that offered a special program that would cut out a year of school…
and I asked God, that if He wanted me to go there, He would make them accept me and offer me a big scholarship. (Like Abraham's servant - he asked that the girl he was supposed to find would give him a drink, and then offer to water all his camels too. I copied him instead of Gideon. :) If that didn't happen… back to the beginning.
I applied to two schools, one that sounded kind of nice and then the one with the program I wanted. The 1st one never even accepted me. My ACT scores were lost and even though I sent them again and in different ways, they did not receive them. The other one accepted me, asked me to be in the honor's program, and promised me the biggest scholarship they could. (And they promised that only because of a note written on a recommendation form for something else. My mom called the school and asked if she could send them that form and they said sure - and then notified me about the scholarship. Had any of that not happened...)
However, my dad wanted me to go to college, but he agreed that sending me off on my own was not the best idea around. The school that accepted me is about 2 1/2 hours away and in a different state than my parent's house, though, and there was no way I was staying in the dorms. (NOT something I feel called to do, shall we say! My two cents - you better feel very strongly that God wants you there before you immerse yourself to that level.) But freshmen are required to stay in the dorms unless they live with their parents.
Since we had actually wanted to move across the state border for a long time, so we started looking for a house. And also trying to figure out how that would work - my dad's job is not portable, and he could not exactly commute 2 1/2 hours each way every day! Soon (before we had that quite figured out) we found a beautiful house, on a river, next to a waterfall, with a pool and a big yard, in the same city as the college! We went through it several times, finding more and more to like about it. It had been for sale for about 3 years, so we figured out an offer and called the realtor. While we had been talking about it, however, someone else bought it. After three years without an offer, someone from South America came up and bought it, just like that! The realtor said, "That was not meant to be, you guys." We had to agree.
After hours and days and weeks of looking and not finding, my dad decided he did not want to sell the house. We would keep our house and rent a place near the school for me to stay. He would stay at our house, take care of our chickens, cats, and german shepherd, go to work, and then on weekends either we'd go there or he'd come here.
So we started looking at rentals. And found a little house only a few blocks from school, with three bedrooms, reasonably priced, and unlike every other rental we looked at, actually livable. The renting agency later told us that, of all the people they have working through their agency, the owner of this particular house was the nicest person, and her house was clearly the best rental around!
Everything worked out, we moved in, and here we are!
We even found a Christian school just down the road where my younger brother can take several PSEO classes, making teaching easier on my mom and giving him a head start. :)
I mention all of the above, just because that is how it's been - everything fitting together and falling perfectly into place before us.
Each thing that has come up has simply worked out, and looking back it's like everything in my life has lined up in this direction. It is so special to be following God, to know that He has a plan, and that He works everything out for good. To see Him working in my life over the past few years has been so cool. :D
The funny this is, after all that, my future is still up in the air. I don't know how I'll do in my classes, what college will be like, if I will ever get accepted into Medical school, what God wants me to do after that… but I know that even if He does not want me here in three months, right now I am where I should be, doing what I should be doing, and it is good.
I finish typing all this up, right?
And then I meet the people who are renting the house right next to me.
One of them is a girl who took 1 year of PSEO
(which I pretty much have the equivalent of),
came to this college
(which I did),
majored in Biochem
(I'm in Biochem/Molecular Biology),
went to summer school
(which I'm hoping to do),
and was accepted into Medical School after 2 years in college!!!!!
And she said to come on over if I had any questions or needed help with my classes or whatever.
Can you believe how God puts things together?
Isn't He amazing?