Saturday, March 29, 2014

this week I...

hey, look what I found...apparently neuro got so crazy I forgot to post it... XD Planning on starting this up again, I said, they're good for me. ;) 

nearly died: 

from lack of sleep. going to bed between 3-6am is NOT my favorite thing to do.

8 hours worth of lecture notes, times 3.5... I might have read a few chapters of something else to keep my brain from slowly disintegrating, but it was very little. :(

listened to:
some Arashi - some of their songs somehow manage to wake my brain up when I'm tired (pretty sure I was up until like 4am once in undergrad, studying and not tired at all because I was listening to them). It beats caffeine, which makes me shaky and crabby. :) 

prayed that:
The scholarship I turned in might possible result in would be a huge help in my quest to not leave medical school owing the government my soul... we will see what happens. :)

very little and nothing I think that was snippetable. :( 

the thing that stood out to me most in school was:
One of the treatments for MS. Comes from recombinant DNA tech using genetically engineered Chinese hamster Ovary cells w/human beta gene introduced. Fascinating. XD Especially when your off-time involved writing about recombinant DNA and genetically engineered human genes. ;) 

learned from the internet:
This is the internet speaking: 

learned from life: 
4 girls in one sled and a Jamaican dinner afterwards is a lot of fun. 

a thing that stood out to me in the Bible:
Actually had to do with another potential cure for MS that I learned about. I haven't researched this one at all, but since MS is a disease where the immune system attacks itself, and also happens to be a disease basically completely unknown in third world countries, some people have tried giving patients roundworms, basically to give their immune system something else to fight so that it stops destroying their own body.
Which, yes, eww, gross...but also still fascinating. And it made me think about Christianity and my childhood and that of a lot of people I know. The adulthood of a lot of people I know, actually.
As children of Christian homes, we've grown up in a very clean environment, far removed from the mess that is the world. And often I've wondered about some of the things Christians argue about - when I see churches shredding apart over whether it is ever acceptable to drink any alcohol (definitely worthy of discussion, not worthy of cutting off pieces of the Body of Christ), or friends becoming less-than-friends over skirt-length (I'm talking below your ankles or above, not mini-skirts), it frustrates me. I've seen sooooo much energy being poured into things that have so little eternal value...and I know how much time in my childhood I spent, wondering if this was all right or if that was okay, when if I had only focused on what I knew was right, had only been out doing what we have all been called to do, using my energy to seek first His Kingdom, wouldn't I have been better off? 
I'm not saying we should never talk about the little things...but I think sometimes our energy turns inward, and we end up destroying what we should have been building up. If we were focused on the battle before us, on protecting and making known the incredible truth God has given us, instead of tearing apart other Christians over perceived differences between us, wouldn't we be closer to what we have been called to be?
Thoughts on that?

Friday, March 28, 2014

My Answers...

to your lovely questions. XD

What kind of doctor do you want to be?
here. you tell me what kind of doctor I should be. XD
I was/do consider psychiatry at times. ;)
I am not entirely sure yet. At the moment, most of my experience has been with general family practice, though I have had some great experiences with a few other specialists. Until I know more about each specialty, I think I'll have a hard time deciding...I do like the variety and broad knowledge base involved in being a GP. And I do know I would really love to be a rural doctor, which most commonly involves being a GP. And my school very much specializes in training GPs. But honestly...we have lecturers come in and actually talk down to us sometimes, which I do not appreciate. Because that knowledge base required is so broad, obviously family practice doctors are not able to know every detail about everything. Which is where the idea of specialists came from. Except that family practice is a specialty too - specializing in the individual or the family, and basically knowing all about them and their disease/injury and where they will need sent if they need sent at all. 
So yeah. :) 

When will you graduate?
Class of 2017, woohoo. I'll hopefully graduate from college this year, though. :D Excited to actually get a degree and prove I've done something with the past 4 years...though in all honesty I have far too little respect for a diploma to deserve one. :P

How many siblings do you have (and where in that order are you)?

There are 5 of us, and by birth order I am second. Though considering that my brother is 7 years older than me and started pastor school when I was 10, I'm really a bit of an oldest child sometimes. And then other times I'm rampantly a second born. ;) 
Except, I've noticed a tendency to beg my younger brothers for things, now that they're taller than me and have jobs, which I don't, making me not so much the older sister. XD When we go shopping together, I go all aegyo and yesterday I'm pretty sure I called my 7-years-younger brother oppa...
He bought me oreos.

How long have you been flying?

I went flying in my grandpa's small plane when I was three or four...started ground school for myself...oy, 9 years ago! That makes me feel old...

What kind of planes do you fly/have you flown?

Cessna 150, 152, 172 are the main ones I've flown...I'd like to learn to fly tail-wheel, though, and technically I could fly much bigger planes, if they weren't so expensive to rent. :P
(Good thing I'm small though - my guy instructors did not much appreciate the 150. They could barely breathe. Meanwhile, I get in the 172 and I'm like...Can I have a cushion to sit on? Actually...two of them?) XD

Have you ever been out of the country?

Canada. Glorious Lake of the Woods.

How old were you when you made a decision to follow Christ?

5-6...decided the following part even more Easter Sunday when I was 11...and I think recently I've been learning how it's a moment-by-moment decision to follow His will. I am His, always and forever, but each moment I have a choice to act as His or to let the ghost of the old man [girl] influence my actions.

How many books have you written?
6, almost 7, mostly rough drafts. :) And then 9 in various stages of begun-ness. 

How many books have you published?

Just one. The editing tends to bog me down when I'm in school. :P

Are you published in any other sources (magazines, newspapers, etc)?

I wrote the introduction to this book:
It was kind of exciting to be published when I was 13. XD

When you finished medical school, do you plan on taking your skills overseas as a missionary doctor? 
Plan, no. I really have no plans beyond finishing my second year and a half of classes. Once I hit rotations, I'll have to have a bit better idea of future plans, but that is then. 
I am open to wherever and whatever God has next. :)

And when do you think you will publish your book(s)?
haha...welllllllll...okay, I would love to self-publish 1 this summer and start looking for agents/publishers for another. We'll see what else happens this summer. :)

And then I was tagged by lovely Jessica, and figured that would fit well here. XD Sooo...

1. What would you title your autobiography?
Ha. Um...Giiwanaadizi? (Ojibwe word meaning she is crazy. XD) I guess it depends. If I wrote it now? I'd probably go find the Ojibwe word that means she is pretentious and absurd. ;) 
If I actually do something interesting in my life and decide to write an autobiography? I dunno. I have a hard time imagining what exactly I'd have to say about myself that would make a readable book...

2. How would you describe your feelings to a person who had never experienced love before?
I think I would simply love them. God is love...but would we have understood that without Him coming and and dying to save us? I would show them love in every way I could, and then tell them it was love.

3. The sun is setting, it's your last day on earth. How did you spend your last day?
Bummer...apparently I tried to catch up on sleep, wrote a blog post, went to my sister's violin lessons, and worked on school stuff. (Yes, I have assignments during spring break...)

4. Your happy color.
It depends...soft yellow generally makes me happy. I want a yellow kitchen. :)

5. Your favorite flower is in bloom, do you a. pick it, b. let it grow and slowly fade and dry the petals c. find a way to extract seeds so you can plant even more next year.
Is there just one of them??? In that case I'd work with the seeds. More than one...PICK IT.

6. Your worst fear has come to pass. What just happened?
Sheesh. Thanks for bringing all my nightmares to mind...truly? Probably that someone I love died and it was my fault. Well, if anyone died and it was my fault. (And it's a frightening thing to be in medical school. Do you have any idea how many ways there are for people to die? And pretty soon it's going to be my fault if I'm unable to stop it, not just if I accidentally caused it. It's something we talk about, and for sure think about, and it's terrifying.)

7. Though a series of  events you suddenly find out you are a princess, how do you handle this? Do you resign and go back to private life, or believe that some people are born great and others have greatness thrust upon them, and that this is your duty come what may.
Princess of where? The decision is all in the details. ;) I'm not one for destiny and fate, so you could probably expect a bit of kicking on my part. Unless I was convinced that it was where God wanted me to be. (Since, despite my grudge against fate, I don't believe in accidents either.)

8. What animal have you always wanted to keep for a pet that you are sure no one would let you keep.
RED PANDA. Or a black panther.  XD I'd say a wolf, but I could actually keep that, if I reeeealllly wanted. (For sure a wolf-dog.)

9. You get a chance to live overseas for one year, where would you go and what would you do?
A year is a long time.

10. You fall asleep and wake up in your favorite childhood storybook. What are you going to do and how are you going to get out?
Who says I want to get out... XD And I don't know...I always had a million favorite books. To pick one at random - Johnny Tremain. I presume I'd run around and see all the famous people and watch revolution-y things and maybe try to keep Rab alive. And I'd probably try going back to sleep as a way to get out. XD

11. Do you multi-task? Does it hinder or help you?
Oh, do I ever multi-task... :D And it depends. Sometimes it's distracting and I'm working on cutting back...but sometimes doing two things at once (say, studying and listening to music, or studying and writing an email on the side) actually keeps me focused on the task at hand. 

Monday, March 10, 2014

that mortality may be swallowed up by life
 now He who has prepared us for this very thing is God
 who also has given us the Spirit as a guarantee
 so we are always confident

Monday, March 3, 2014

Mirror, Mirror...

since neuro may or may not have devoured my brain, I content myself with a chatterbox very nearly a snippet this month...but one that came directly to mind when I read Rachel's prompt, and one which I therefore had to put no work into. :P :) Hope you all are having a lovely March!

Contract to Time Travel
The door swung shut after him, and [he] felt the smile fall away from his face. He doubled over, pressing his hand hard against the place in his chest that hurt.
But what was the use in whimpering? Straightening with a wrench, he forced himself to his feet. There was a sink in the wall beside the door, and he went to it. The tall faucet opened with a creak, cool water spilling out and swirling down the drain.
Closing his eyes, he stuck his entire head into the stream, feeling the paint run from his face. He opened his mouth, drinking the cool water, before he straightened pushing the hair from his forehead with one hand and touching the side of the mirror, where the cleanser hung, with the other.
He glanced at himself in the mirror as he stripped off the black nail polish that marked him as an assassin. The paint was gone from his skin, except directly about his eyes, where the lines he had drawn earlier remained clearly in place. He let the water run over his fingertips, watched the polish blacken the sink, then disappear. It was gone. His hands were clean.
He lifted his gaze, searching the reflection of his own eyes in the tiny mirror, a darkness no water could wash away shadowing their suma-lined depths. Perhaps the future would be easier.
    But the past could not be erased.


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