Monday, March 29, 2010

I went flying today. :) :) :)

For the first time in months.

(months as in... more than 12 months)

I was surprised at how much I remembered!

But I was also surprised at how difficult some things were.

Like... just the pressure needed to move the yoke up or down.

My muscles were really out of practice!

And the sad thing is - that was something that shouldn't have been difficult.

Ok, maybe the precision could have been a little off or something.

But I should have been in shape enough from other things that two hours of flying didn't make my shoulders hurt!

But they did.

Know why?

Because I've been letting a lot of things slip lately.

I haven't been taking care of myself (eating junk food, not exercising, going to bed WAY too late every night)

I haven't been taking care of my time (yeah, even when refusing to allow myself on facebook, twitter, etc, the internet has been eating a lot of my time)

I haven't been getting all of the school done that I should be (I have a lot left to get done and am running out of time!)

I haven't been taking care of the relationships I should be focusing on most ("come play with me" "sorry, I have to do school" - ok for school, but why do I have to do school then? because I was doing something else earlier. Usually something a lot less important than spending time with my siblings or helping my parents or grandparents.)

So when I need to do something (get up early, use my muscles, etc) it's a lot harder than it needs to be. For the regular stuff I'm doing, I'm fine (or almost fine).

But when a little extra is needed - I don't have it.

The scary thing is, I've been realizing how much this has to do with my real life.

I haven't been memorizing, I haven't been seeking God as hard as I could be, and my thoughts are taken up with the things that I spend time on. I have not been using self-control, while at the same time I'm watching myself get more and more selfish. I'm doing ok (I think) but I'm afraid that when a little extra is needed - I won't have it.
Strangely enough, what I've been reading in both My Utmost for His Highest and His Princess for the past week or so (besides what I've read in my Bible and seen in my life) has really been along these lines. I've tried to do better - but I can't. It's so easy to think, oh, when I need to, I'll start doing ____ again. But I've found it's a lot easier to stop doing what you're supposed to than to start it up again. However, it is also true that God promises His help to us, and so...

I'm ready to start working on myself. :)

I'm not sure how it will all work out, but I know I don't want to find myself tiring out when I need to stand strong, because of how I have chosen to spend my time.

Seek Him!

2 thoughts shared:

Jessica said...

Thank you for the thought provoking post. It is so hard to tell sometimes what you should or should not be doing with everything that goes on in life...but I am facing the same struggle over here friend. Lets work on this together. :) Have a great day Kate!

Merriette said...

Wonderful post, Kate. I'm afraid all that is true of me as well. Praise God He is a merciful Father always ready to help us in our failings!


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